End of an era

It's funny how little inconsequential things can really affect you at times.

I'm on my last trip on my current passport. When I get back I'm sending it off for renewal ahead of my NY trip in March; something I'm incredibly excited for.

And yet I'm heartbroken.

That passport has been to hell and back with me, I got it in 2006 ahead of a family holiday to Egypt, back then I was only self-diagnosed and still studying astrophysics!

That passport has gained me entry to Egypt, San Francisco, Athens, Lisbon, Malta and more. It's been through a degree change, a life validating assessment, a graduation, and numerous other important events.

When I got that passport I lived at home, my paternal grandfather was alive and well, my mum was a single divorcee and my sister was just a primary school child.

Now I'm in my own flat, my grandmother has been a widow for a number of years, my mum is happily married to my stepfather and my sister has just started her university degree to become a midwife!

It's difficult to put into words just what handing over that passport will mean to me; I know I get it back but it's very much like an end of an era. This is truly the last vestiges of childhood being lost as this new passport I will be paying for myself - the first time I have had to, and it will be the one that lasts me through my 30s.

I struggle to grasp the concept of what life may be like in 10 years time when I have to renew my passport again. Will it involve the same nostalgia and odd emotions? What stamps will this one have collected? I already know there will be a Department of Homeland Security one in there come March but where else will the next 10 years take me? Will that passport even last me the full 10 years? By that time I may have a new married surname or a new title should I have earned my PhD by then!

All I know at the moment is that you can't remain in the past and you shouldn't worry for the future excessively. What will happen will happen at its own pace and at the end of the day we may all be vaporised tomorrow by Vogons anyway!