I've been reading a lot of articles recently about the season length and injury attrition, and its got me thinking about just why I agree so much with Billy V and Christian Day.
See, I have the type of life where I can fully understand burn-out and attritional damage. The way being autistic affects me is similar to what Billy and Christian describe when talking about little niggles and injuries that don't heal properly. Only mine is mostly in my head, where the outcome isn't needing surgery or physio, but needing dark and quiet to stop the immense pressure building inside my skull.
Autism Fatigue is a term I talk a lot about so I'm not going to rehash everything I've said before (especially as I'm trying to write a book about it right now!) but the one thing I will say is that the "little and often" approach to breaks only really work when they're in tandem with a longer more complete break.
Days here and there when I don't speak to anyone and don't have to mask are what keep me ticking over week after week, but without that knowledge that I have a longer break on the horizon the mental health aspect kicks in and I spiral into a depressive cycle.
And this is what I fear for our players; that without an appropriate length break/pre season period their mental health will suffer and the knocks/niggles will take longer to shake off when it's so much harder to convince yourself to do the rehab work required.
I don't want to be hearing that players aren't available for selection because they're fighting depression and anxiety as well as injuries, it's bad enough that these guys will suffer through those dark days after they retire, don't put them through it while they're still playing!!
My support of my club and country doesn't wane during off-season, I don't forget about rugby as a sport if it's not on TV every weekend. Yes I miss it fiercely, enough that when it comes back I'm positively chomping at the bit to get over to Twickenham for the LDH, but not to the point where I go looking for another sport to replace it! (Wimbledon and Le Tour don't count, they are events that happen during the day that I watched every year long before I got back into rugby!)
The rugby head honchos don't need to find ways to "keep viewers" around in summer months by stretching the season - a concept that doesn't reduce player work load but actually increases it for the international stars as they will have their post competition rest on a rest week with everyone else and so be available for more club games selection than currently!
Rugby needs to be leading the way in sport in demonstrating to children how to have a healthy relationship with exercise; to not start leading impressionable minds down the garden path to the "must go to the gym everyday" mentality that can cause body image difficulties in young men and women. Rugby union is a shining example of how a sport can be family friendly and still attract the adults, can be home grown and exciting, can be world class and still relatable.
So, to Billy, Christian, and any of the other players saying the same thing, I support you 100% in whatever action you as players choose to take, upto and including a full strike.
I stand with the players, now and always, in saying that player health and welfare must come first in these discussions. Now is the time to take this stand, to protect current and future generations of players and role models while protecting the spirit and ethos of the game we love so much.
#RugbyFamily
Showing posts with label Sport. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sport. Show all posts
Monday, 2 October 2017
Thursday, 21 September 2017
Sarries in Philly!!!!!
There was a lot said about this fixture when it was first announced, mostly negative and critical. And yes, the crowd was a bit thin on the ground and the boys had to work incredibly hard in the humid heat of Pennsylvania but that's not the core of this fixture.
The heart of what the Premiership were trying to do was, in my opinion, achieved.
I spent time before the match with Sarries fans from New York and Virginia Beach, with Newcastle fans who'd struggled with JFK C&I even worse than me, with life long rugby fans and relatively new ones.
I was lucky enough to be in contact with BT Sport this weekend, and thus got asked to be a part of the pre-game filming with Sarra Elgan. She made sure to speak to two of the USA based Sarries fans who were with us before the 'lone' Falcon in the group (he wasn't, just the only one willing and around to be filmed!) and then lil ole me!
I'd already talked to Sarra earlier in the day when we'd encountered her at the famous Rocky steps by the Philadelphia Museum of Art and had had the chance to have a decent chat with the BT Sport team and even a quick photo with ref JP Doyle when he randomly appeared!
Consequently I found myself kinda becoming the face of Sarries support in Philly - even more so when the Saracens social media team got me to do a good luck message to the boys on Instagram because Paul told them I could "talk for England"!!
I'm happy to do these things though because it's a subject I'm comfortable with, my public speaking reputation is good because I know the topics I talk about - autism, Saracens, space, physics, maths, working in a school, PRUs, all that is in my comfort zone. Ask me to talk about anything else and, well, it may not be pretty!
Back to the topic at hand now!
The match itself was not what you'd call the epitome of English rugby but it was very hot, bright, slippery ball conditions as the sun was setting across the stadium, and to be perfectly honest you're never gonna get the gold standard match in round 3! Maybe the next stage for the great American conversion is to get live showings of the ECC games and play-off matches going in big stadiums, sending a retired player or two over to do Q&As pre game.
My weekend wasn't just about the match though! I've detailed my Friday nightmare in this post: http://hjellis.blogspot.co.uk/2017/09/how-many-ways-can-one-journey-go-wrong but once on Philly my attention shifted from my complaining to having a great time in a new and exciting city!
Friday night was spent at the Hard Rock Cafe in my new Wal-Mart dress whilst Saturday morning was taken up with lots of laughter and photographs at the Rocky steps - particularly once Flats got there and had to don a fleece lined tracksuit to copy Sly's famous scenes!
We chose to head to the stadium really early as we wanted to witness the American phenomenon of "tailgating" - an interesting experience I must say!
We covered the car with Sarries flags to let everyone know who we were (Champions of Europe, we know who we are!) and waited to see who showed up. We knew of at least 3 groups headed our way, one of whom pitched up a gazebo so we quickly transferred the flags to the sides and made it Camp Sarries!
The next hour or so was spent sharing drinks and swapping stories of how we started following Saracens along with some interesting tales from the US Navy! We were joined by some Falcons fans and I had some sympathetic ears to my tale of horror and woe from my journey out as they had missed a connection at JFK thanks to the ridiculous chaos that is US Customs & Immigration!!
We were invited to join the BT crew again and so wandered over to the fan zone they were setting up, where I got to have my 5 minutes of fame on camera! (And then get inundated with notifications going "was that you?" "You were on my TV!")
Heading in to the stadium it was a strange place that distinctly reminded us of several prem stadiums, predominately the AJ Bell and the Stoop to me.
The merchandise shop showcased just what some of us are crying out for Sarries to do - women's jewellery!! I picked up one of the official match day t-shirts as a souvenir but was disappointed not to find any of the 'America Series' rugby balls that had been used in the online advertising. We did however manage to find pins which kept Adam happy!
I also struggled with finding a drink that wasn't a soft drink or beer! Having had 2 bottles of peach cider courtesy of our naval friend I was in the mood for another drink. It took a complete circuit of the stadium to find the one bar that did a bottled cider - no wine or spirits options anywhere!! And even then I was given my bottle of cider poured into a massive larger-than-a-pint plastic glass that every time I drank from took up my entire face so I couldn't see anything!!
During the match it was a bizarrely quiet experience, I've grown used to the Sarries fans getting the chants going and there not being many of us meant anything we tried starting never really went anywhere which was a bit embarrassing!
The second half of the game saw several of the non-playing squad wander past us up the steps to their box area, Loz seemed positive about his shoulder injury when I asked him how it was doing which is good! There were some moments of Sarries brilliance showing through, I nearly killed my vocal chords screaming for Wiggy when he went sprinting towards the try line at one point!
Towards the end of the game I head over to the guys to see if they would be willing to have a quick photo with us and the flags, seeing as we had travelled rather a long way to support the club!! At this point the lovely Duncan Taylor was an absolute gent and got the others to hold fire for a few minutes on the final whistle to let us get a few snaps off quickly before they 'll hurtled down to the changing rooms for the tiki tonga session!
Sadly the game had been so hot, humid and exhausting that the lads only briefly waved and applauded the crowd on their quick circuit of the pitch, leaving me fairly deflated and my mind crashing back to that dark place I'd been in after the Edinburgh game in May.
We got out of the stadium fairly quickly after we realised they weren't going to be around any time soon due to PR commitments and probably a vast need for ice baths and physio treatments! Heading back to the hotel fairly knackered and finally reunited with a phone charger I was taken aback when the humid heat very suddenly gave way to a torrential downpour, the likes of which I've only ever seen once in Florida!
Getting back to the hotel I couldn't actually get out my side of the car due to the mini lake forming and had to slide over out the other door instead, suddenly encountering the strangest of sensations - hot rain! The air was still so warm and yet the water was pouring down at a rate of knots!! Very bizarre to an English girl used to rain meaning grey miserableness!
The return to the hotel also brought the unwelcome news that my suitcase hadn't shown up and so a call to the lost baggage number was needed in order to discover that it was in New York and should be getting to me that evening.
After a few hours of unwinding, dreading all the social media messages I'd received about my starring role and generally sorting out plans for the next day I headed off to bed via a quick check with downstairs that my bag still hadn't arrived.
The next morning dawned cooler and grey than before and there was a distinct feeling of dread in my stomach as I woke. Checking my Virgin Atlantic app to confirm when I needed to be at the airport I was horrified to see that my flight home was no longer what I had expected to see!
The flights I'd been booked on for months going home via JFK were no longer there and suddenly I was being flown home via Atlanta Georgia with Delta the whole way getting to Heathrow at 11am!!!
What the hell!!!
A frantic call to Virgin discovered that Delta had inexplicably changed my flights for me and just hadn't bothered to let me know! In tears and furious I demand it be changed back only to be told that my flight to Heathrow was now fully booked!! So in the 48hours between me last checking my homeward bound flight and that morning they'd sold on my seat!!!
I was beyond furious and internally panicking like a man at the gallows, how the hell was I getting home?!? I didnt want to go via Georgia, i barely wanted to go via JFK but had accepted it as a forgone conclusion. The last thing I wanted was more changes, more crap moving me about! I was supposed to go straight to work from landing at Heathrow which is why I'd picked at flight landing at 8am!!
Well, actually originally I'd picked one landing at 7.20am only for Delta to move the first flight later meaning I wouldn't have enough of a connecting time so I'd had to call Virgin back in July to switch to a slightly later departure. And now the bastards at Delta had changed things again!
Eventually we managed to get me on to a flight leaving JFK at 9.30pm, due to get to London around 9.30am. Okay, sorted. Now to find out where the hell my suitcase was!
It turns out it was still (this is Sunday 8am) in frigging JFK having gotten waylaid in customs and missed the last flight on Saturday!! So now my choice was to either ask for it to be returned to London and buy a new hold bag to put all my newly purchased items into to come home or to travel to the airport after 11am to collect it from there in person as there was now no time for it to be delivered to the hotel and me to pack it before we had to check out at 1pm!! I told them to hold it at Philly airport and we would come collect it before midday.
Flights and luggage now sorted we had breakfast and then got on the road to go see the Liberty Bell. It wasn't something that particularly interested me, I look on the independence stuff as historical proof of treason against the crown by a bunch of rebels but that's just me!
We spent some time wandering around the area and I found a way to spend some money in the Liberty hall shop - only I could go all the way to America to their most historical sites and come back with a glitter timer and a maths pendant!
Still, I did have a good laugh at this sign on one of the walls - I've found things older than that in my garden at home!!
A quick visit to the airport to collect my suitcase and we were back to the hotel to change and pack up. I could finally wear one of the outfits I had packed for the trip as everything else got thrown in and locked up again ready to go back to the airport!!
Dennys was our lunch stop choice and it was an interesting experience although I am very glad I went for the big meal of steak and mash given what was to come still!
I got dropped at the airport just after 2pm by the Feaseys as they were off to the British Airways terminal for international departure as they had just the one flight home, where as I was on an internal to JFK where I had a 3hr layover waiting for me!
The check in for my Delta flight threw up an unexpected problem however as their system was still showing me as on the Atlanta bound flight!! Another call to Virgin and handing my phone over to the Delta staff and eventually I got my boarding passes for the right flights!
Suitcase was now back out of my hands less than 4 hours after I'd been reunited with it and I was through security and sat at the gates bored.
Really really bored.
After all the stress and problems last time I'd given myself so much slack time that I was now left with over 90mins to my flight departure and nothing to do! I managed to waste a fair amount of time by finding a charge point and hooking my phone in before calling my mum and then my dad for long chats about the match but that would only work for this wait, by the time I got to JFK they would all be in bed.
The flight to New York was uneventful really, apart from being unexpectedly placed on an exit row! When we landed there was a delay with getting the connecting gate bridge thing to us and I joked to my neighbour that we were spending more time in the plane on the ground at JFK than we did in the air! He was headed for a Heathrow flight to as he was taking a trip to the UK so I shared some suggestions with him of historical sites to visit while there which he seemed to appreciate.
Finally off the plane I found myself at the gate for my next flight in about 30 minutes as there was no security to go through! Now I could see that the flight was already saying a 10pm departure so I had even longer to wait!
And this is where my luck changed.
Wandering around the gate area for the London departing flights who should I see in front of me but one Chris Wyles!
Oh my God, the team are here to fly home!!!
I couldn't believe it, suddenly I'm seeing and saying hi to guys like Wyles, Ben Spencer, Sean Maitland! I even had a brief chat with Sean saying how I thought it's unfair that he doesn't get the try to his tally as JP gave the penalty try because he could see Sean was clearly going to score when the illegal move was made! He agreed and told me he'd been screaming at Goodey to get it to him as he could see he could score it!
I had thought I was going to be so lonely and bored but instead I got this amazing gift of being able to casually spend some time with my favourite people!!
I didn't take any pictures that evening, I made a concious choice to not be a selfie fan who hassled them at that stage but to just talk to them for as long as they let me. Any time one of them said "take care" or "see you later" I would wander off again and leave that person alone. I think one or two of them found it bizarre and I know that a few found it amusing, I was outrightly saying that I was on my own and starved for conversation so was desperate just to see familiar faces! It was quite nice though when some of those faces recognised me back, I'd had a great conversation with Wiggy and his missus at the Bedford game so he recognised me as we chatted briefly, Brad also recognised me from holding the flag up at the end of the game, even saying sorry for not coming over but he was too sore to try to jump the electronics barrier the stadium had separating us from the pitch!
One of the best moments of my whole weekend came though when I saw Billy walking towards me. I asked him directly why he couldn't have released his new book in time for me to read on the flight to which he replied that he thought it was already out!!! No Bill, it's on sale next week! Then, the legend that he is goes and finds me one from one of the lads as they've all been given a copy!! I have Billy's book and it was given to me by the man himself!!!
I was so happy with this and even more so when some of the other players saw me carrying it and struck up conversation about it with me!! George Kruis even joked that it wouldn't take me long to read as it was in big font! Maro was also interested in it when I asked to shake his hand, as I told him, I didn't want to hassle any of them but I'd been trying to shake his hand for well over a year now with little success due to the massive crowds everywhere he goes!!
Maro was an absolute gentleman and had a wry, slightly embarrassed smile when I said that but was really chilled out about me being there talking to him and the others. Most of the team had started filtering through the gate by this point as their flight left ages before mine (Wiggy and Sean had both asked if I was on their flight which I was a bit gutted to say no to!) I made the mistake of asking for "tries to win next week please" in jest to Wyles and Liam as they were going to board and ahead in the queue Owen suddenly turned around to look at me - I'm not sure if he was just surprised by a non-teammate voice or took offence to what I said - I didn't mean anything against him scoring points from penalties!!
Watching some of the huge guys like Will Skelton put flight socks on and line up for sleeping tablets from the harried Laura was amusing, Goodey seemed in an especially happy mood given the lengthy flight ahead!
The funniest moment though was right at the end, I had thought the whole squad had been through by that point and I'd just missed seeing a few, the staff were looking like they were moving to close when suddenly several of them appear armed with McDonald's!! Schalla seemed to recognise me immediately as he sat down with his meal, joking away about the queue for food and laughing when I asked if they hadn't used the "don't you know who I am?" move! Apparently that barely works in England for our rugby boys!! The guys suddenly seemed to realise they were holding up the flight leaving when a staff member came to tell them that they could take their food on board if they wanted to! That didn't stop Schalla trying to give away his fries to the cleaner/me/the gate staff however!!!
As their gate finally closed and that flight departed I was left alone again but with rich, treasured memories of the past hour.
Unfortunately by this point it was far too late to call anyone in England to share them with!! A few dashed off tweets expressing my gratitude to the team before I turned my attention to Billy's book! It kept me entertained for quite a while before restlessness got to me and I had to start wandering again. Annoyingly my flight was now saying it was delayed again, with boarding not due to start until 9.45pm! I was getting rather frustrated at this point, especially as the main reason I wasn't on the team's flight was because I'd been told back in July that I wouldn't have enough time between the flights to make it . . . I clearly would have had plenty!!!!!
Eventually we boarded and then taxied. And taxied. And taxied. Just after 11pm we finally took off and left America!!
I had hoped for a good flight that I could sleep on seeing as I was going straight to work but no. I had a guy in front put his chair back straight away leaving me with restricted room, the guy next to me immediately put in earplugs/eye mask/blanket and go to sleep so I couldn't get out at all and two rows back in the aisle a screaming baby!!
By 9am BST, when I should have started work, when I would have been clearing Heathrow baggage claim originally I was still 617miles from landing and really rather grouchy!!
Still, as the rather stressful trip drew to a close I can look back on some incredible memories and, once my various complaints have been made and settled, forget all about the crap that happened and just remember that I was there and no-one can every take that away from me.
#SarriesStateside
#SarriesInPhilly🇺🇸🖤❤
The heart of what the Premiership were trying to do was, in my opinion, achieved.
I spent time before the match with Sarries fans from New York and Virginia Beach, with Newcastle fans who'd struggled with JFK C&I even worse than me, with life long rugby fans and relatively new ones.
I was lucky enough to be in contact with BT Sport this weekend, and thus got asked to be a part of the pre-game filming with Sarra Elgan. She made sure to speak to two of the USA based Sarries fans who were with us before the 'lone' Falcon in the group (he wasn't, just the only one willing and around to be filmed!) and then lil ole me!
Consequently I found myself kinda becoming the face of Sarries support in Philly - even more so when the Saracens social media team got me to do a good luck message to the boys on Instagram because Paul told them I could "talk for England"!!
Back to the topic at hand now!
The match itself was not what you'd call the epitome of English rugby but it was very hot, bright, slippery ball conditions as the sun was setting across the stadium, and to be perfectly honest you're never gonna get the gold standard match in round 3! Maybe the next stage for the great American conversion is to get live showings of the ECC games and play-off matches going in big stadiums, sending a retired player or two over to do Q&As pre game.
My weekend wasn't just about the match though! I've detailed my Friday nightmare in this post: http://hjellis.blogspot.co.uk/2017/09/how-many-ways-can-one-journey-go-wrong but once on Philly my attention shifted from my complaining to having a great time in a new and exciting city!
Friday night was spent at the Hard Rock Cafe in my new Wal-Mart dress whilst Saturday morning was taken up with lots of laughter and photographs at the Rocky steps - particularly once Flats got there and had to don a fleece lined tracksuit to copy Sly's famous scenes!
We chose to head to the stadium really early as we wanted to witness the American phenomenon of "tailgating" - an interesting experience I must say!
We covered the car with Sarries flags to let everyone know who we were (Champions of Europe, we know who we are!) and waited to see who showed up. We knew of at least 3 groups headed our way, one of whom pitched up a gazebo so we quickly transferred the flags to the sides and made it Camp Sarries!
The next hour or so was spent sharing drinks and swapping stories of how we started following Saracens along with some interesting tales from the US Navy! We were joined by some Falcons fans and I had some sympathetic ears to my tale of horror and woe from my journey out as they had missed a connection at JFK thanks to the ridiculous chaos that is US Customs & Immigration!!
We were invited to join the BT crew again and so wandered over to the fan zone they were setting up, where I got to have my 5 minutes of fame on camera! (And then get inundated with notifications going "was that you?" "You were on my TV!")
Heading in to the stadium it was a strange place that distinctly reminded us of several prem stadiums, predominately the AJ Bell and the Stoop to me.
The merchandise shop showcased just what some of us are crying out for Sarries to do - women's jewellery!! I picked up one of the official match day t-shirts as a souvenir but was disappointed not to find any of the 'America Series' rugby balls that had been used in the online advertising. We did however manage to find pins which kept Adam happy!
I also struggled with finding a drink that wasn't a soft drink or beer! Having had 2 bottles of peach cider courtesy of our naval friend I was in the mood for another drink. It took a complete circuit of the stadium to find the one bar that did a bottled cider - no wine or spirits options anywhere!! And even then I was given my bottle of cider poured into a massive larger-than-a-pint plastic glass that every time I drank from took up my entire face so I couldn't see anything!!
During the match it was a bizarrely quiet experience, I've grown used to the Sarries fans getting the chants going and there not being many of us meant anything we tried starting never really went anywhere which was a bit embarrassing!
The second half of the game saw several of the non-playing squad wander past us up the steps to their box area, Loz seemed positive about his shoulder injury when I asked him how it was doing which is good! There were some moments of Sarries brilliance showing through, I nearly killed my vocal chords screaming for Wiggy when he went sprinting towards the try line at one point!
Towards the end of the game I head over to the guys to see if they would be willing to have a quick photo with us and the flags, seeing as we had travelled rather a long way to support the club!! At this point the lovely Duncan Taylor was an absolute gent and got the others to hold fire for a few minutes on the final whistle to let us get a few snaps off quickly before they 'll hurtled down to the changing rooms for the tiki tonga session!
Sadly the game had been so hot, humid and exhausting that the lads only briefly waved and applauded the crowd on their quick circuit of the pitch, leaving me fairly deflated and my mind crashing back to that dark place I'd been in after the Edinburgh game in May.
We got out of the stadium fairly quickly after we realised they weren't going to be around any time soon due to PR commitments and probably a vast need for ice baths and physio treatments! Heading back to the hotel fairly knackered and finally reunited with a phone charger I was taken aback when the humid heat very suddenly gave way to a torrential downpour, the likes of which I've only ever seen once in Florida!
Getting back to the hotel I couldn't actually get out my side of the car due to the mini lake forming and had to slide over out the other door instead, suddenly encountering the strangest of sensations - hot rain! The air was still so warm and yet the water was pouring down at a rate of knots!! Very bizarre to an English girl used to rain meaning grey miserableness!
The return to the hotel also brought the unwelcome news that my suitcase hadn't shown up and so a call to the lost baggage number was needed in order to discover that it was in New York and should be getting to me that evening.
After a few hours of unwinding, dreading all the social media messages I'd received about my starring role and generally sorting out plans for the next day I headed off to bed via a quick check with downstairs that my bag still hadn't arrived.
The next morning dawned cooler and grey than before and there was a distinct feeling of dread in my stomach as I woke. Checking my Virgin Atlantic app to confirm when I needed to be at the airport I was horrified to see that my flight home was no longer what I had expected to see!
The flights I'd been booked on for months going home via JFK were no longer there and suddenly I was being flown home via Atlanta Georgia with Delta the whole way getting to Heathrow at 11am!!!
What the hell!!!
A frantic call to Virgin discovered that Delta had inexplicably changed my flights for me and just hadn't bothered to let me know! In tears and furious I demand it be changed back only to be told that my flight to Heathrow was now fully booked!! So in the 48hours between me last checking my homeward bound flight and that morning they'd sold on my seat!!!
I was beyond furious and internally panicking like a man at the gallows, how the hell was I getting home?!? I didnt want to go via Georgia, i barely wanted to go via JFK but had accepted it as a forgone conclusion. The last thing I wanted was more changes, more crap moving me about! I was supposed to go straight to work from landing at Heathrow which is why I'd picked at flight landing at 8am!!
Well, actually originally I'd picked one landing at 7.20am only for Delta to move the first flight later meaning I wouldn't have enough of a connecting time so I'd had to call Virgin back in July to switch to a slightly later departure. And now the bastards at Delta had changed things again!
Eventually we managed to get me on to a flight leaving JFK at 9.30pm, due to get to London around 9.30am. Okay, sorted. Now to find out where the hell my suitcase was!
It turns out it was still (this is Sunday 8am) in frigging JFK having gotten waylaid in customs and missed the last flight on Saturday!! So now my choice was to either ask for it to be returned to London and buy a new hold bag to put all my newly purchased items into to come home or to travel to the airport after 11am to collect it from there in person as there was now no time for it to be delivered to the hotel and me to pack it before we had to check out at 1pm!! I told them to hold it at Philly airport and we would come collect it before midday.
Flights and luggage now sorted we had breakfast and then got on the road to go see the Liberty Bell. It wasn't something that particularly interested me, I look on the independence stuff as historical proof of treason against the crown by a bunch of rebels but that's just me!
We spent some time wandering around the area and I found a way to spend some money in the Liberty hall shop - only I could go all the way to America to their most historical sites and come back with a glitter timer and a maths pendant!
A quick visit to the airport to collect my suitcase and we were back to the hotel to change and pack up. I could finally wear one of the outfits I had packed for the trip as everything else got thrown in and locked up again ready to go back to the airport!!
Dennys was our lunch stop choice and it was an interesting experience although I am very glad I went for the big meal of steak and mash given what was to come still!
I got dropped at the airport just after 2pm by the Feaseys as they were off to the British Airways terminal for international departure as they had just the one flight home, where as I was on an internal to JFK where I had a 3hr layover waiting for me!
The check in for my Delta flight threw up an unexpected problem however as their system was still showing me as on the Atlanta bound flight!! Another call to Virgin and handing my phone over to the Delta staff and eventually I got my boarding passes for the right flights!
Suitcase was now back out of my hands less than 4 hours after I'd been reunited with it and I was through security and sat at the gates bored.
Really really bored.
After all the stress and problems last time I'd given myself so much slack time that I was now left with over 90mins to my flight departure and nothing to do! I managed to waste a fair amount of time by finding a charge point and hooking my phone in before calling my mum and then my dad for long chats about the match but that would only work for this wait, by the time I got to JFK they would all be in bed.
The flight to New York was uneventful really, apart from being unexpectedly placed on an exit row! When we landed there was a delay with getting the connecting gate bridge thing to us and I joked to my neighbour that we were spending more time in the plane on the ground at JFK than we did in the air! He was headed for a Heathrow flight to as he was taking a trip to the UK so I shared some suggestions with him of historical sites to visit while there which he seemed to appreciate.
Finally off the plane I found myself at the gate for my next flight in about 30 minutes as there was no security to go through! Now I could see that the flight was already saying a 10pm departure so I had even longer to wait!
And this is where my luck changed.
Wandering around the gate area for the London departing flights who should I see in front of me but one Chris Wyles!
Oh my God, the team are here to fly home!!!
I couldn't believe it, suddenly I'm seeing and saying hi to guys like Wyles, Ben Spencer, Sean Maitland! I even had a brief chat with Sean saying how I thought it's unfair that he doesn't get the try to his tally as JP gave the penalty try because he could see Sean was clearly going to score when the illegal move was made! He agreed and told me he'd been screaming at Goodey to get it to him as he could see he could score it!
I had thought I was going to be so lonely and bored but instead I got this amazing gift of being able to casually spend some time with my favourite people!!
I didn't take any pictures that evening, I made a concious choice to not be a selfie fan who hassled them at that stage but to just talk to them for as long as they let me. Any time one of them said "take care" or "see you later" I would wander off again and leave that person alone. I think one or two of them found it bizarre and I know that a few found it amusing, I was outrightly saying that I was on my own and starved for conversation so was desperate just to see familiar faces! It was quite nice though when some of those faces recognised me back, I'd had a great conversation with Wiggy and his missus at the Bedford game so he recognised me as we chatted briefly, Brad also recognised me from holding the flag up at the end of the game, even saying sorry for not coming over but he was too sore to try to jump the electronics barrier the stadium had separating us from the pitch!
One of the best moments of my whole weekend came though when I saw Billy walking towards me. I asked him directly why he couldn't have released his new book in time for me to read on the flight to which he replied that he thought it was already out!!! No Bill, it's on sale next week! Then, the legend that he is goes and finds me one from one of the lads as they've all been given a copy!! I have Billy's book and it was given to me by the man himself!!!
I was so happy with this and even more so when some of the other players saw me carrying it and struck up conversation about it with me!! George Kruis even joked that it wouldn't take me long to read as it was in big font! Maro was also interested in it when I asked to shake his hand, as I told him, I didn't want to hassle any of them but I'd been trying to shake his hand for well over a year now with little success due to the massive crowds everywhere he goes!!
Maro was an absolute gentleman and had a wry, slightly embarrassed smile when I said that but was really chilled out about me being there talking to him and the others. Most of the team had started filtering through the gate by this point as their flight left ages before mine (Wiggy and Sean had both asked if I was on their flight which I was a bit gutted to say no to!) I made the mistake of asking for "tries to win next week please" in jest to Wyles and Liam as they were going to board and ahead in the queue Owen suddenly turned around to look at me - I'm not sure if he was just surprised by a non-teammate voice or took offence to what I said - I didn't mean anything against him scoring points from penalties!!
Watching some of the huge guys like Will Skelton put flight socks on and line up for sleeping tablets from the harried Laura was amusing, Goodey seemed in an especially happy mood given the lengthy flight ahead!
The funniest moment though was right at the end, I had thought the whole squad had been through by that point and I'd just missed seeing a few, the staff were looking like they were moving to close when suddenly several of them appear armed with McDonald's!! Schalla seemed to recognise me immediately as he sat down with his meal, joking away about the queue for food and laughing when I asked if they hadn't used the "don't you know who I am?" move! Apparently that barely works in England for our rugby boys!! The guys suddenly seemed to realise they were holding up the flight leaving when a staff member came to tell them that they could take their food on board if they wanted to! That didn't stop Schalla trying to give away his fries to the cleaner/me/the gate staff however!!!
As their gate finally closed and that flight departed I was left alone again but with rich, treasured memories of the past hour.
Unfortunately by this point it was far too late to call anyone in England to share them with!! A few dashed off tweets expressing my gratitude to the team before I turned my attention to Billy's book! It kept me entertained for quite a while before restlessness got to me and I had to start wandering again. Annoyingly my flight was now saying it was delayed again, with boarding not due to start until 9.45pm! I was getting rather frustrated at this point, especially as the main reason I wasn't on the team's flight was because I'd been told back in July that I wouldn't have enough time between the flights to make it . . . I clearly would have had plenty!!!!!
Eventually we boarded and then taxied. And taxied. And taxied. Just after 11pm we finally took off and left America!!
I had hoped for a good flight that I could sleep on seeing as I was going straight to work but no. I had a guy in front put his chair back straight away leaving me with restricted room, the guy next to me immediately put in earplugs/eye mask/blanket and go to sleep so I couldn't get out at all and two rows back in the aisle a screaming baby!!
By 9am BST, when I should have started work, when I would have been clearing Heathrow baggage claim originally I was still 617miles from landing and really rather grouchy!!
Still, as the rather stressful trip drew to a close I can look back on some incredible memories and, once my various complaints have been made and settled, forget all about the crap that happened and just remember that I was there and no-one can every take that away from me.
#SarriesStateside
#SarriesInPhilly🇺🇸🖤❤
Saturday, 16 September 2017
How many ways can one journey go wrong?!?!
I dont know what deity I pissed off recently to deserve a day like today!
My day started smoothly, I woke in the Park Inn hotel near Heathrow where I'd checked in last night, the room was an upgrade to the one of reserved (yay) but seemed to have the remnants of someone's coffee in it (boo). Still I'd had food (at the bar as the restaurant had a 45min wait for a table for one!) and had a lovely bath before painting my nails the Sarries colours and finalising what was in suitcase or hand luggage.
I'd missed a hotel hoppa bus by a minute due to the check out desk being busy but I thought with over 2 hours to departure I would be fine.
I'd tried the night before to check in using the Virgin Atlantic app on my phone but had failed so I needed to check in at the main desks, this didn't really bother me until the kiosk rejected my check in and told me to speak to someone.
That someone then typed in my details, got a confused look and took me over to the customer service helpdesk where things got, uh, difficult.
It's turns out that despite lengthy conversations with Virgin Atlantic over the past 4 months (since I changed my flight from an L.A. holiday to this trip to Philly) including one as recently as this week via their websites 'chat' function about using my airmiles to fly home premium economy (they told me there was no availability) no-one mentioned that there was an outstanding balance to pay still!!
Now, bare in mind that I had booked these flights by phone in May, at the time I called to change my reservations I distinctly remember being told a figure (the different in flight prices plus and admin fee) and giving the person my card details!!
And yet I'm standing in Heathrow with my flight leaving in less than 2hours being told my ticket won't print as I haven't paid for all of it!!
I was not happy. In fact I very nearly tumbled straight into a panic induced meltdown on the spot!
I stammered about having paid at the time but in the end just handed over my card knowing that the only way I was getting to America today was to pay and argue for a refund later when I can get a May bank statement.
Of course this brought the usual panic around whether my card would go through! Even knowing I had enough in the account I still really sorry with large amounts and get super nervous that it will reject if my bank thinks it's fraud!
So, card handed over should be end of story right?
No
The lady on the desk was coordinating the problem with another member of the Virgin team off site somewhere (their HQ I think) and was being put on hold constantly, told to cancel things she had done until they'd done something, I got very confused and distressed at this point so don't remember clearly.
What I do remember is looking at the clock constantly with the lovely first lady reassuring me that there was plenty of time. By 7.55am I could see she was starting to worry about making my 9.05 flight though. She very helpfully went to get me a glass of water to take a painkiller with as I'd ditched my liquids already!
Bag drop was due to close at 8.10am. The clock kept ticking as this hold music played . . .
Eventually the person on the line gave the go ahead for me tickets to be printed and the lovely desk lady did them as quickly as possible for me, printing at 8.12!
A dash to bag drop then with the first lady, she'd called over to a colleague to not close my flight for me! I then left my suitcase sat next to a check in desk with 2 others and some Heathrow staff who were to take them to my flight as late arrivals authorised to go on.
I was then hurried through to the First Class security where I said goodbye to the wonderful woman who'd been with me for almost an hour at this point, having got me through security in less than 5 minutes!
A quick march to the already open gate with no time to stop to have breakfast, use the ladies or even buy a bottle of water and I was in a queue to board!!
The staff on the flight could not have been nicer to me! They spotted my obvious distress (I'd been crying for close to 45 minutes on and off) and when I told them I'm autistic they just asked what I needed - I replied a drink to which they asked what I wanted!
After that the main staff member for my section in economy (a lady called Jemma) came over to say hi and have a chat before take-off. We discussed the mornings events and how I was still fairly shaky at this point but that I loved flying so was hoping to be okay soon.
By this point boarding had finished and the doors were locked . . . No-one was sat next to me!!! The day is looking up!!
The flight itself was lovely, the first staff member I spoke to brought me my vodka cranberry almost immediately and I started to settle down.
6 hours of in-flight wi-fi goodness later and I was starting to get nervous again though.
I had to change to a connecting flight at JFK, something I'd never done before, as Virgin don't fly to Philadelphia direct. Jemma again was brilliant in reassuring me and talking through what I would have to do once off the plane, she even offered to get some of the ground staff to meet me and guide me through.
Getting off the plane (and leaving my iPad in the seat pocket as I would realise hours later!) I was a bit nervous, being at the back of the plane is great for my wing watching habit but not so good for a speedy exit on disembarking!!
Eventually I got off the plane but discovered that the ground staff were not nearly as helpful as Jemma was, she tried to get the "assist" staff to help me but was told they "only do wheelchairs" and wouldn't help me. After a few minutes I decided to just give up and thanked Jemma for her efforts saying I was going to give it a go by myself.
Well, Jemma had said to follow certain signs as I had a connecting flight in under 2 hours but when I got to the C&I hall is was utter chaos!
I tried to ask staff members for help but they were so ridiculously unhelpful! On man I asked for help just told me to "go elsewhere"!
Eventually I figured out the machines system and then had to join a long snaking queue that was merging with queues of people trying to use the machines! I end up stood for ages near a family with a toddler and a baby, both of whom were being rather grizzly.
As we slowly shuffled about I got to a point where I could see a staff member manning the queue. I tried to speak to him to ask the estimated time to get through but ended up catching the attention if a female staff member instead.
By this point I was very stress and on the verge of tears and close to losing my words completely.
I tried to ask her what the chances of me making my flight we're, holding my boarding pass to display the boarding/departure times as I was getting so flustered.
I was met with a distinctly snide "ma'am if you want me to help you jump the queue then get that boarding pass outta my face"
I tried to say I wasn't asking to jump just for a time approximation and that I was autistic. She turned her back on me, opened the tape and pointed me to a queue at customs kiosk saying "go"
So I joined that queue, now with tears trickling and my stress scratching moving from my arms to my upper chest/neck.
I was then joined almost immediately by the bloody family with the young kids who stood behind me talking in their language (one of the Slavic languages I think) while the baby did that half-whimper, half-cry thing.
I was sensory flinching every few minutes at this point and whispering to myself to stay calm and not react but it was getting harder and harder.
Over an hour after getting off the plane and having skipped huge chunks of queues, I was next in line for the customs officer. The lady at the desk completed her business and moved through but the officer was typing on his computer so I didn't move. I felt a nudge in my back. I didn't move. I've been shouted at by American officers before for moving forward before called! The officer then looked up and beckoned me forward so I went.
At his desk he was fairly sunny and pleasant but he made the mistake of asking me if I was okay and the flood gates opened then and soon I was crying nearly uncontrollably as I explained my flight was already boarding!
He got me to redo the fingerprints and photo as the machine I used hadn't registered them properly so my C&I official entry to the country photo has tears rolling down my cheeks!!
He quickly processed me and told me where to go to collect my baggage. In the USA all baggage must be collected at your first entry point and re-checked for the connecting flight which to me seems insane, my ticket is for the whole journey so why doesn't my luggage just go the whole way before I get it back?!?!
So I went to the conveyor belt my flight was coming out of, there was huge amounts of baggage everywhere, stacks of it on the floors between the belts and the one I was at had two flights on it, mine and another.
After close to 15 minutes of waiting and watching the luggage come down and join the belt I asked a staff member who was pulling bags off the belt to stack on the floor. He told me that all the Heathrow bags were off the belt now and on the floor the other side - between 5 and 6, not 6 and 7 where I'd been checking!!
Going round I scanned the bags left. No bag. I check with another staff member, that's all of them she said, if it's not there then it wasn't on the plane.
Great. I now had to run to my next flight with no suitcase!
Getting to the Delta desk to check in for my next flight I was told to hurry as it was boarding and wouldn't wait.
Struggling to rush after 7 hours on a flight and with my dodgy back I walked as briskly as I could to security where luckily (as I asked a staff member there about my chances of making the flight) I was queue skipped again right to the x-ray machines/body scanner.
Of course I'd had no time to sort my hand luggage again so it was a scramble to get my liquids back into a bag and separated from my hand luggage bag before I joined the metal detector queue.
I was then told to take my flip flops off. Now London and most Europe airports have for a long time now said you only have to remove shoes at security if they are closed shoes (trainers/boots/loafers etc) not flip flops. But not JFK. No so I had to go back, grab another tray and throw my flip flops in and then join a queue again that was being held up by a deeply stupid/confused old man who kept setting off the metal detector as he had all sorts of crap still in his pockets!
Finally through and reunited with my things (in such a rush I wasn't registering there was no iPad anywhere) I shoved my feet back into the flipflops and set off as quickly as I could go to gate B42. Of course, as at Heathrow it was a gate pretty much as far from security as possible!!
I tried to go fast but a lower back spasm and shin splints slowed me down so much. I walked as quickly as possible and literally made it to the gate as the staff member was announcing "final call for passenger Ellis"!
On to the plane I had a bit of a shock - it was tiny!! I'd just come off a huge transatlantic flight to to get on to a plane that had 75 seats max was a bit 'woah!'
I changed my seat as I was due to sit next to someone but didn't see the point of making them move to let me in when there were so many free rows as the plane was 1/3rd full!
Well, I knew it would be a short flight but we were in the air less than 40 minutes by my estimation!!
The attendant actually said she thinks we were taxi-ing longer than we were flying!!
Finally at my destination I was united with the lovely Feasey family and got to spill my story and tears on to Sue's shoulder!
A trip to the Delta baggage collection desk followed with an explanation of the situation. Apparently my suitcase was still in London!
Now armed with the information that it would be delivered to my hotel the next day around lunchtime, we received a pack of 'essentials' and departed for the car, where Paul drove us to Wal-Mart for me to buy some clothes!!
I'm a pragmatic hand-luggage packer so had put my match outfit in my hand-luggage with 2 sets of contact lenses so I had all of that with me thankfully, but I was missing essentials like pyjamas and something to wear to go to dinner in that evening as I did not want to spend another minute in my flight outfit!
A $90 credit card payment later and I had a selection of clothes and toiletries to sort me out. The Delta essentials kit was nice but only had the basics - a razor, toothbrush and paste, a folding comb, stick deodorant and a thin white tshirt. I needed face wipes, a roll-on (I hate stick deodorant), some eye liner (all my make up was in my suitcase bar my sun cream stick and perfume) and a proper hairbrush!
Finally to the hotel I could have a shower and put on clean (new) clothes to go out to dinner, having first drunk nearly my body weight in water as I was so dehydrated and hungry! No time at either airport post security meant I hadn't been able to pick up snacks or bottled water anywhere and was only surviving because the transatlantic flight gave out drinks all through the flight!
It was a bit of a horrific day all told and I have lots of complaints and lost property procedures to follow now but I'm finally in Philadelphia!!!
#SarriesStateside
#SarriesInPhilly🇺🇸🖤❤
My day started smoothly, I woke in the Park Inn hotel near Heathrow where I'd checked in last night, the room was an upgrade to the one of reserved (yay) but seemed to have the remnants of someone's coffee in it (boo). Still I'd had food (at the bar as the restaurant had a 45min wait for a table for one!) and had a lovely bath before painting my nails the Sarries colours and finalising what was in suitcase or hand luggage.
I'd missed a hotel hoppa bus by a minute due to the check out desk being busy but I thought with over 2 hours to departure I would be fine.
I'd tried the night before to check in using the Virgin Atlantic app on my phone but had failed so I needed to check in at the main desks, this didn't really bother me until the kiosk rejected my check in and told me to speak to someone.
That someone then typed in my details, got a confused look and took me over to the customer service helpdesk where things got, uh, difficult.
It's turns out that despite lengthy conversations with Virgin Atlantic over the past 4 months (since I changed my flight from an L.A. holiday to this trip to Philly) including one as recently as this week via their websites 'chat' function about using my airmiles to fly home premium economy (they told me there was no availability) no-one mentioned that there was an outstanding balance to pay still!!
Now, bare in mind that I had booked these flights by phone in May, at the time I called to change my reservations I distinctly remember being told a figure (the different in flight prices plus and admin fee) and giving the person my card details!!
And yet I'm standing in Heathrow with my flight leaving in less than 2hours being told my ticket won't print as I haven't paid for all of it!!
I was not happy. In fact I very nearly tumbled straight into a panic induced meltdown on the spot!
I stammered about having paid at the time but in the end just handed over my card knowing that the only way I was getting to America today was to pay and argue for a refund later when I can get a May bank statement.
Of course this brought the usual panic around whether my card would go through! Even knowing I had enough in the account I still really sorry with large amounts and get super nervous that it will reject if my bank thinks it's fraud!
So, card handed over should be end of story right?
No
The lady on the desk was coordinating the problem with another member of the Virgin team off site somewhere (their HQ I think) and was being put on hold constantly, told to cancel things she had done until they'd done something, I got very confused and distressed at this point so don't remember clearly.
What I do remember is looking at the clock constantly with the lovely first lady reassuring me that there was plenty of time. By 7.55am I could see she was starting to worry about making my 9.05 flight though. She very helpfully went to get me a glass of water to take a painkiller with as I'd ditched my liquids already!
Bag drop was due to close at 8.10am. The clock kept ticking as this hold music played . . .
Eventually the person on the line gave the go ahead for me tickets to be printed and the lovely desk lady did them as quickly as possible for me, printing at 8.12!
A dash to bag drop then with the first lady, she'd called over to a colleague to not close my flight for me! I then left my suitcase sat next to a check in desk with 2 others and some Heathrow staff who were to take them to my flight as late arrivals authorised to go on.
I was then hurried through to the First Class security where I said goodbye to the wonderful woman who'd been with me for almost an hour at this point, having got me through security in less than 5 minutes!
A quick march to the already open gate with no time to stop to have breakfast, use the ladies or even buy a bottle of water and I was in a queue to board!!
The staff on the flight could not have been nicer to me! They spotted my obvious distress (I'd been crying for close to 45 minutes on and off) and when I told them I'm autistic they just asked what I needed - I replied a drink to which they asked what I wanted!
After that the main staff member for my section in economy (a lady called Jemma) came over to say hi and have a chat before take-off. We discussed the mornings events and how I was still fairly shaky at this point but that I loved flying so was hoping to be okay soon.
By this point boarding had finished and the doors were locked . . . No-one was sat next to me!!! The day is looking up!!
The flight itself was lovely, the first staff member I spoke to brought me my vodka cranberry almost immediately and I started to settle down.
6 hours of in-flight wi-fi goodness later and I was starting to get nervous again though.
I had to change to a connecting flight at JFK, something I'd never done before, as Virgin don't fly to Philadelphia direct. Jemma again was brilliant in reassuring me and talking through what I would have to do once off the plane, she even offered to get some of the ground staff to meet me and guide me through.
Getting off the plane (and leaving my iPad in the seat pocket as I would realise hours later!) I was a bit nervous, being at the back of the plane is great for my wing watching habit but not so good for a speedy exit on disembarking!!
Eventually I got off the plane but discovered that the ground staff were not nearly as helpful as Jemma was, she tried to get the "assist" staff to help me but was told they "only do wheelchairs" and wouldn't help me. After a few minutes I decided to just give up and thanked Jemma for her efforts saying I was going to give it a go by myself.
Well, Jemma had said to follow certain signs as I had a connecting flight in under 2 hours but when I got to the C&I hall is was utter chaos!
I tried to ask staff members for help but they were so ridiculously unhelpful! On man I asked for help just told me to "go elsewhere"!
Eventually I figured out the machines system and then had to join a long snaking queue that was merging with queues of people trying to use the machines! I end up stood for ages near a family with a toddler and a baby, both of whom were being rather grizzly.
As we slowly shuffled about I got to a point where I could see a staff member manning the queue. I tried to speak to him to ask the estimated time to get through but ended up catching the attention if a female staff member instead.
By this point I was very stress and on the verge of tears and close to losing my words completely.
I tried to ask her what the chances of me making my flight we're, holding my boarding pass to display the boarding/departure times as I was getting so flustered.
I was met with a distinctly snide "ma'am if you want me to help you jump the queue then get that boarding pass outta my face"
I tried to say I wasn't asking to jump just for a time approximation and that I was autistic. She turned her back on me, opened the tape and pointed me to a queue at customs kiosk saying "go"
So I joined that queue, now with tears trickling and my stress scratching moving from my arms to my upper chest/neck.
I was then joined almost immediately by the bloody family with the young kids who stood behind me talking in their language (one of the Slavic languages I think) while the baby did that half-whimper, half-cry thing.
I was sensory flinching every few minutes at this point and whispering to myself to stay calm and not react but it was getting harder and harder.
Over an hour after getting off the plane and having skipped huge chunks of queues, I was next in line for the customs officer. The lady at the desk completed her business and moved through but the officer was typing on his computer so I didn't move. I felt a nudge in my back. I didn't move. I've been shouted at by American officers before for moving forward before called! The officer then looked up and beckoned me forward so I went.
At his desk he was fairly sunny and pleasant but he made the mistake of asking me if I was okay and the flood gates opened then and soon I was crying nearly uncontrollably as I explained my flight was already boarding!
He got me to redo the fingerprints and photo as the machine I used hadn't registered them properly so my C&I official entry to the country photo has tears rolling down my cheeks!!
He quickly processed me and told me where to go to collect my baggage. In the USA all baggage must be collected at your first entry point and re-checked for the connecting flight which to me seems insane, my ticket is for the whole journey so why doesn't my luggage just go the whole way before I get it back?!?!
So I went to the conveyor belt my flight was coming out of, there was huge amounts of baggage everywhere, stacks of it on the floors between the belts and the one I was at had two flights on it, mine and another.
After close to 15 minutes of waiting and watching the luggage come down and join the belt I asked a staff member who was pulling bags off the belt to stack on the floor. He told me that all the Heathrow bags were off the belt now and on the floor the other side - between 5 and 6, not 6 and 7 where I'd been checking!!
Going round I scanned the bags left. No bag. I check with another staff member, that's all of them she said, if it's not there then it wasn't on the plane.
Great. I now had to run to my next flight with no suitcase!
Getting to the Delta desk to check in for my next flight I was told to hurry as it was boarding and wouldn't wait.
Struggling to rush after 7 hours on a flight and with my dodgy back I walked as briskly as I could to security where luckily (as I asked a staff member there about my chances of making the flight) I was queue skipped again right to the x-ray machines/body scanner.
Of course I'd had no time to sort my hand luggage again so it was a scramble to get my liquids back into a bag and separated from my hand luggage bag before I joined the metal detector queue.
I was then told to take my flip flops off. Now London and most Europe airports have for a long time now said you only have to remove shoes at security if they are closed shoes (trainers/boots/loafers etc) not flip flops. But not JFK. No so I had to go back, grab another tray and throw my flip flops in and then join a queue again that was being held up by a deeply stupid/confused old man who kept setting off the metal detector as he had all sorts of crap still in his pockets!
Finally through and reunited with my things (in such a rush I wasn't registering there was no iPad anywhere) I shoved my feet back into the flipflops and set off as quickly as I could go to gate B42. Of course, as at Heathrow it was a gate pretty much as far from security as possible!!
I tried to go fast but a lower back spasm and shin splints slowed me down so much. I walked as quickly as possible and literally made it to the gate as the staff member was announcing "final call for passenger Ellis"!
On to the plane I had a bit of a shock - it was tiny!! I'd just come off a huge transatlantic flight to to get on to a plane that had 75 seats max was a bit 'woah!'
I changed my seat as I was due to sit next to someone but didn't see the point of making them move to let me in when there were so many free rows as the plane was 1/3rd full!
Well, I knew it would be a short flight but we were in the air less than 40 minutes by my estimation!!
The attendant actually said she thinks we were taxi-ing longer than we were flying!!
Finally at my destination I was united with the lovely Feasey family and got to spill my story and tears on to Sue's shoulder!
A trip to the Delta baggage collection desk followed with an explanation of the situation. Apparently my suitcase was still in London!
Now armed with the information that it would be delivered to my hotel the next day around lunchtime, we received a pack of 'essentials' and departed for the car, where Paul drove us to Wal-Mart for me to buy some clothes!!
I'm a pragmatic hand-luggage packer so had put my match outfit in my hand-luggage with 2 sets of contact lenses so I had all of that with me thankfully, but I was missing essentials like pyjamas and something to wear to go to dinner in that evening as I did not want to spend another minute in my flight outfit!
A $90 credit card payment later and I had a selection of clothes and toiletries to sort me out. The Delta essentials kit was nice but only had the basics - a razor, toothbrush and paste, a folding comb, stick deodorant and a thin white tshirt. I needed face wipes, a roll-on (I hate stick deodorant), some eye liner (all my make up was in my suitcase bar my sun cream stick and perfume) and a proper hairbrush!
Finally to the hotel I could have a shower and put on clean (new) clothes to go out to dinner, having first drunk nearly my body weight in water as I was so dehydrated and hungry! No time at either airport post security meant I hadn't been able to pick up snacks or bottled water anywhere and was only surviving because the transatlantic flight gave out drinks all through the flight!
It was a bit of a horrific day all told and I have lots of complaints and lost property procedures to follow now but I'm finally in Philadelphia!!!
#SarriesStateside
#SarriesInPhilly🇺🇸🖤❤
Sunday, 29 January 2017
30 Games for 30 Birthdays!
I'm now over the halfway mark of my "30 Games for 30 Birthdays" challenge, as was set to me by family back in the summer.
The challenge is fairly simple in theory - attend 30 Saracens games in the 2016/17 season, and get a photograph containing myself, at least one other person and the match programme for each one.
So far I've been to 16 games, travelled over 2100 miles, spend over a thousand pounds and have had the most phenomenal time!
I've watched some brilliant moments of rugby but I've also borne witness to some brilliantly hilarious moments of rugby supporters! From the wonderful musical pre-game experience in Toulon to the drunken curry based antics in Bristol, its been at times an almost overwhelming mix of social experiences but I have loved it all!
I've been lucky enough to share this experience with the most amazing group of people in the Saracens supporters - it truly is like a sprawling, bizarre, family where you'll rarely encounter someone who doesn't know at least one other person you know, and where everyone looks out for each other and makes sure that a good time is being had by all!
I'm so grateful to have had the chance to shake the hands of greats, to have taken photos of superstars and to have persuaded exhausted, but victorious, legends to hold up a flag for a photo! (Thanks Schalk and Jamie!)
As I approach the infamous birthday, I can't help but wonder what the 'second half' of this challenge will hold; trips to Worcester, Newcastle and Wembley and a whole host of home games. To achieve the full 30 games using only Saracens matches I will need us to reach the finals of the European Champions Cup *and* the Aviva Premiership. A doable event, seeing as we currently hold both those trophies, but still it's going to be a nail-biting race to the end!
Bring it on!
The challenge is fairly simple in theory - attend 30 Saracens games in the 2016/17 season, and get a photograph containing myself, at least one other person and the match programme for each one.
So far I've been to 16 games, travelled over 2100 miles, spend over a thousand pounds and have had the most phenomenal time!
I've watched some brilliant moments of rugby but I've also borne witness to some brilliantly hilarious moments of rugby supporters! From the wonderful musical pre-game experience in Toulon to the drunken curry based antics in Bristol, its been at times an almost overwhelming mix of social experiences but I have loved it all!
I've been lucky enough to share this experience with the most amazing group of people in the Saracens supporters - it truly is like a sprawling, bizarre, family where you'll rarely encounter someone who doesn't know at least one other person you know, and where everyone looks out for each other and makes sure that a good time is being had by all!
I'm so grateful to have had the chance to shake the hands of greats, to have taken photos of superstars and to have persuaded exhausted, but victorious, legends to hold up a flag for a photo! (Thanks Schalk and Jamie!)
As I approach the infamous birthday, I can't help but wonder what the 'second half' of this challenge will hold; trips to Worcester, Newcastle and Wembley and a whole host of home games. To achieve the full 30 games using only Saracens matches I will need us to reach the finals of the European Champions Cup *and* the Aviva Premiership. A doable event, seeing as we currently hold both those trophies, but still it's going to be a nail-biting race to the end!
Bring it on!
Saturday, 21 January 2017
Why I love Nigel Owens
I have a natural instinct to trust sportspeople - I don't mean any one who plays sport, but anyone I classify as a 'sportsperson', anyone I see as having the qualities of true sportsmanship: integrity, honesty, passion, dedication, respect and humility. The kind of person who would 'walk' if they know they were caught out, who would stand and take the telling off from the official that's half their size, who would applaud a genuinely fantastic piece of play from an opposition side, who would never even dream of simulating or trying to escalate trouble.
I have a lot of love for the game of rugby; I see the qualities of sportsmanship in many, many of the players in the top tiers and the creeping edge of football style simulation and crowd baying for cards is mildly concerning to me. What stops this being a full-blown worry though is the presence of referees like Nigel Owens.
Nigel Owens is one of my heroes, he is widely respected in the world of rugby as one of the best officials; accurate and sure of his own decisions without needing to go to the TMO every thirty seconds, and yet willing to be honest and upfront when he makes a (rare) mistake. He speaks to the players clearly and concisely, never being vague about his rulings. He controls the games with a firm hand but with a dry wit, never mean or harshly biting, just genuinely funny at times!
"The football stadium is 500 yards that way…"
I think the main appeal to me here is the manner in which he goes about his job; it appeals to me as an autistic person because he is so clear in his decision making, so set in the way he wants things do, so in charge and unwilling to be intimidated by anyone.
I don't know if its the brilliant one-liners like his "I'm straighter than that!" quip about a dodgy line-out or the awe-inspiring way he lays down the law to the huge 8ft/40 stone monsters around him but he is without a doubt one my favourite sportsmen of this generation and a name I am always happy to see on a match day line-up. Even if he is Welsh.
“I’m not like some refs who could quote you the number of the law, with or without the brackets, of course I know them. But knowing the laws too well and technically applying those laws, well you’ll never have a game of rugby. You’ve got to have a bit of empathy as well.”
I have a lot of love for the game of rugby; I see the qualities of sportsmanship in many, many of the players in the top tiers and the creeping edge of football style simulation and crowd baying for cards is mildly concerning to me. What stops this being a full-blown worry though is the presence of referees like Nigel Owens.
Nigel Owens is one of my heroes, he is widely respected in the world of rugby as one of the best officials; accurate and sure of his own decisions without needing to go to the TMO every thirty seconds, and yet willing to be honest and upfront when he makes a (rare) mistake. He speaks to the players clearly and concisely, never being vague about his rulings. He controls the games with a firm hand but with a dry wit, never mean or harshly biting, just genuinely funny at times!
"The football stadium is 500 yards that way…"
I think the main appeal to me here is the manner in which he goes about his job; it appeals to me as an autistic person because he is so clear in his decision making, so set in the way he wants things do, so in charge and unwilling to be intimidated by anyone.
I don't know if its the brilliant one-liners like his "I'm straighter than that!" quip about a dodgy line-out or the awe-inspiring way he lays down the law to the huge 8ft/40 stone monsters around him but he is without a doubt one my favourite sportsmen of this generation and a name I am always happy to see on a match day line-up. Even if he is Welsh.
“I’m not like some refs who could quote you the number of the law, with or without the brackets, of course I know them. But knowing the laws too well and technically applying those laws, well you’ll never have a game of rugby. You’ve got to have a bit of empathy as well.”
Saturday, 31 December 2016
My resounding memory of 2016
My resounding memory of 2016 will be of staring at a screen in shocked disbelief.
It's been a year of staring as news rolled in of Trump's victory, the Brexit result, he murder of Jo Cox, the deaths of Prince/David Bowie/Alan Rickman/Carrie Fisher, the awful events in Brussels/Nice/Orlando and all round the world.
Luckily those horrible moments have also been countered with a different type of shocked disbelief for some wonderfully happy things like England's 3-0 whitewash of the Wallabies, Bryony Page's silver medal in trampolining and Saracens becoming Champions of Europe, as well as the genuine 'what the hell' version of shocked disbelief when Froome had to run up a hill in France and the Keirin gold medal race got reset twice!!
So, yeah, 2016, the year of staring at a screen in shocked disbelief.
It's been a year of staring as news rolled in of Trump's victory, the Brexit result, he murder of Jo Cox, the deaths of Prince/David Bowie/Alan Rickman/Carrie Fisher, the awful events in Brussels/Nice/Orlando and all round the world.
Luckily those horrible moments have also been countered with a different type of shocked disbelief for some wonderfully happy things like England's 3-0 whitewash of the Wallabies, Bryony Page's silver medal in trampolining and Saracens becoming Champions of Europe, as well as the genuine 'what the hell' version of shocked disbelief when Froome had to run up a hill in France and the Keirin gold medal race got reset twice!!
So, yeah, 2016, the year of staring at a screen in shocked disbelief.
Sunday, 10 July 2016
An inspiring week
Everyone has weeks that are tough, weeks that you wish would end already or never have happened, weeks that just make life seem so grey and rubbish.
This was not one of those weeks for me.
I am so lucky to have the opportunities I do in my life; to be able to stand in front of a crowd in Westminster and have them listen to what I have to say, to be able to see my family so often, to be able to share moments with people I love, and to get to meet some truly inspirational people.
Meeting Henry Fraser at his incredible art exhibition 'Hand to Mouth' was one of the most significant moments of recent times for me; he is someone that doesn't just inspire me but reminds me of the important things in life - to focus on "what you can do, not what you cant do". To have the opportunity to get to thank him in person for being a continual source of positivity has made me reaffirm my vow to not get caught up in the negative of life, but to continue to find ways to see the strengths in disappointment and to improve as a person with every knock-back or failure.
This week has been a phenomenal one for finding hope for the future thanks to the wealth of sport on TV; witnessing Andy Murray win Wimbledon again, watching Chris Froome's brilliant descent sprint to the Yellow jersey, seeing Yates and Cav in the White and Green jerseys, all these marvellous things give me such enjoyment and passion for British sport again - let's cheer Froomey on to victory in Paris in 14 days and then its time to bring on Rio!!
More than anything I hope that the sense of positivity coming out of British sport rights now will help to lift this country out of the funk its been in recently and start to unite and heal our people; the world is in a sorry state right now, but as some wonderful people have reminded me lately - even the hardest of adversities can be overcome with the right mental attitude and a willingness to accept what cannot be changed.
Saturday, 14 May 2016
Its a generation thing
I am so goddamn lucky to be the age I am - I grew up watching Will Carling, the Underwood boys and Jerry Guscott on my TV as a child, got to witness history in the making as a teenager watching Johnno, Wilkinson and the boys in Aus do the impossible thanks to ITV, and now as an adult venturing into actually being at the games in person I get to see the marvellous talent that is Itoje, Kruis, Farrell and co go from strength to strength.
Musically I wish I'd been born 20 years earlier, technologically I cant help feeling the next 50 years are going to be the place to live in, but sport wise I'm definitely in the exact generation I want to belong to!
Musically I wish I'd been born 20 years earlier, technologically I cant help feeling the next 50 years are going to be the place to live in, but sport wise I'm definitely in the exact generation I want to belong to!
Monday, 25 April 2016
Isolation vs over-stimulation
I've come to realise recently just how isolated my life had become from what it used to be; I spend the whole working day with the same people, very rarely interacting with anyone new, before coming home to an empty flat where I spend my evenings alone with my TV and laptop for company, making the occasional phone calls to the same half dozen people. My weekends are often just me and my revision / housework / recovery processes, once in a whilst interspersed with a visit to/from a family member or a trip into London to do something Autism related.
Compare this to the almost manically busy life I used to have when I was a student - days filled with lectures, union meetings, social groups and endless nights out I barely remember (but know were good fun!) That life wasn't sustainable though and I often found myself suddenly having to spend periods retreating from my plans and hiding away in an almost hibernating state to restore some balance. Sometimes just coming down from an over-stimulation was a long slog on its own, the world didn't stop being noisy and bright and demanding just because I wanted a time-out and people weren't always very understanding when I tried to explain that it wasn't an alcohol hangover I had but a sensory or social one.
The tricky thing in life is finding the mid-way point between what's needed for recovery and isolation and then putting that on an even functioning keel with social activity (bearing in mind that work/going to the supermarket/filling the car with petrol all count as a form of social activity!)
I find now as I'm older and more knowledgeable about my own limitations and predictable reactions that I can start to formulate ways to 'have my cake and eat it' - by finding activities that fulfil my need for interactions whilst still allowing me enough down time to be ready to face whatever the next day may hold.
Throughout the Sunday-Thursday period I have to tread carefully to ensure that my working day the next day is not impacted upon by any lingering effects but come Friday/Saturday I have a lot more freedom to push my boundaries and go for the full-on 'social experience' and all the consequences that follow it. Its difficult to explain at times but even the smallest of things can add to a growing mountain of stimulation leading to overload; one too many announcements on a train, the overly strong perfume of the person in front at the cashpoint queue, multiple TV's showing different games/sports in pubs, too many new faces and names to remember at once, the list can be endless.
My latest excursion into London (and straight back out to Reading) for Saturday's Saracens vs Wasps semi-final was one of the more bizarre yet successful experiences I've had recently - a match I hadn't planned to attend yet found myself in possession of tickets for courtesy of a Twitter competition. All of a sudden not only did I now have plans for a previously free weekend but I had to work out a whole host of details, including who I was giving the other ticket to! Family and friends were all unavailable as due to the short notice (I found out I had tickets on the Tuesday) they were all booked up. Luckily social media came to my rescue and I was able to have a really wonderful time at the game with someone who not only appreciated the ticket but was able to give me a crash-course introduction to being a full-on member of the Sarries family!
I know not every experience I try will have such a happy ending (and most definitely wont involve that much wine being consumed afterwards!) and some will have potentially catastrophically bad results should my coping strategies fail me at the worst times, but I do know for sure that if I don't keep trying new things and pushing myself out there in the big wide world that the isolation I will be faced with will be horrible.
I don't like being on my own too long, I am, at heart, a people person who loves watching others enjoy life. I just have to weigh the balance of my need to indulge that side of my personality with what it will cost me without retreating into a fear-dominated mind-set of not doing anything 'in case' I can't cope.
Compare this to the almost manically busy life I used to have when I was a student - days filled with lectures, union meetings, social groups and endless nights out I barely remember (but know were good fun!) That life wasn't sustainable though and I often found myself suddenly having to spend periods retreating from my plans and hiding away in an almost hibernating state to restore some balance. Sometimes just coming down from an over-stimulation was a long slog on its own, the world didn't stop being noisy and bright and demanding just because I wanted a time-out and people weren't always very understanding when I tried to explain that it wasn't an alcohol hangover I had but a sensory or social one.
The tricky thing in life is finding the mid-way point between what's needed for recovery and isolation and then putting that on an even functioning keel with social activity (bearing in mind that work/going to the supermarket/filling the car with petrol all count as a form of social activity!)
I find now as I'm older and more knowledgeable about my own limitations and predictable reactions that I can start to formulate ways to 'have my cake and eat it' - by finding activities that fulfil my need for interactions whilst still allowing me enough down time to be ready to face whatever the next day may hold.
Throughout the Sunday-Thursday period I have to tread carefully to ensure that my working day the next day is not impacted upon by any lingering effects but come Friday/Saturday I have a lot more freedom to push my boundaries and go for the full-on 'social experience' and all the consequences that follow it. Its difficult to explain at times but even the smallest of things can add to a growing mountain of stimulation leading to overload; one too many announcements on a train, the overly strong perfume of the person in front at the cashpoint queue, multiple TV's showing different games/sports in pubs, too many new faces and names to remember at once, the list can be endless.
My latest excursion into London (and straight back out to Reading) for Saturday's Saracens vs Wasps semi-final was one of the more bizarre yet successful experiences I've had recently - a match I hadn't planned to attend yet found myself in possession of tickets for courtesy of a Twitter competition. All of a sudden not only did I now have plans for a previously free weekend but I had to work out a whole host of details, including who I was giving the other ticket to! Family and friends were all unavailable as due to the short notice (I found out I had tickets on the Tuesday) they were all booked up. Luckily social media came to my rescue and I was able to have a really wonderful time at the game with someone who not only appreciated the ticket but was able to give me a crash-course introduction to being a full-on member of the Sarries family!
I know not every experience I try will have such a happy ending (and most definitely wont involve that much wine being consumed afterwards!) and some will have potentially catastrophically bad results should my coping strategies fail me at the worst times, but I do know for sure that if I don't keep trying new things and pushing myself out there in the big wide world that the isolation I will be faced with will be horrible.
I don't like being on my own too long, I am, at heart, a people person who loves watching others enjoy life. I just have to weigh the balance of my need to indulge that side of my personality with what it will cost me without retreating into a fear-dominated mind-set of not doing anything 'in case' I can't cope.
Saturday, 16 April 2016
Dealing with over stimulation in public
The trouble with doing anything really big and popular (like attending a Derby Day!) is that it's virtually guaranteed to cause a whole host of autism problems at the time and/or later.
The main reason for this is that, obviously, a lot of other people are wanting to do it as well so there are massive crowds to deal with, often lots of excitable children running around, generally public transport to deal with and fairly often nowadays a big publicity/marketing machine blasting out adverts and music at high volumes.
All of this leads to a massive drain on energy levels just to keep that 'public face' mask on - the one that looks happy and calm and isn't showing the intense pain that's being experienced at the time. I understand the need for big venues (particularly sports venues) to create and stimulate 'atmosphere' but I would like some acknowledgement of the cost of this on people like me.
Today's Saracens vs Quins game at Wembley was wonderful but there were moments when I could have done without the random blasting of pop music and the overly excitable commentator. Overall though Wembley/Saracens did pretty well at hosting an enjoyable but relatively autism friendly event.
By far and away the worst event I have been to in my life however was back in November when I went to the O2 arena to see the Tennis ATP finals (Murray vs Nadal). What I endured there actually drove me to tears and ended up forcing me to leave early as I simply could not bear to remain in that environment any longer. The whole venue was blue coloured (as it was sponsored by Barclays Bank who are blue themed) which meant that wherever there was lighting it was the blue shade that makes me automatically think of emergency services sirens which leads to low-level but consistent anxiety. Most of the problems I had with the venue (very airless and 'close') could have been overcome but for the damn graphics the event insisted on using every time there was a challenged decision - a pulse beat on the screen and at full volume echoing across the court. Now, maybe its just me but I hear a beat that sounds similar to a heartbeat and my heart subconsciously tries to mimic it, leading to an increased highly-anxious heartrate and my breathing starting to go into hyperventilation. All of this led to me needing quite a bit 'down-time' to recover enough to drive my brother and me home that evening, a recovery that was set-back by the fact that I had to deal with getting the tube from the arena back to where my car was parked in Westfield!
The issue of 'what happens afterwards' came to the forefront today as well, while the getting to Wembley wasn't too bad and dealing with crowds going in was surprisingly calm the exit, naturally, wasn't. Even though I stayed to watch the Sarries boys do their lap of the pitch and then wasted another 15 minutes or so faffing around finding where my friend had left his bike, still the crowds for the tube were horrible to deal with. I wish that there could have been shuttle buses specifically running people to the nearby major train terminals (Kings Cross, Euston, Paddington etc) to allow for those of us going there to avoid the tube, leaving it just for those who were connecting to other parts of the City.
I made it home in one piece mostly - a major headache and quite a considerable need for quiet, but in a lot better shape than from other times I've been into London. Despite how good today has been though I know I've still got recovery ahead of me, tomorrow will probably come with a strong desire for sleep and quiet processing time along with other side effects such as affected appetite, clumsiness and probably achey joints.
It was worth it though - Stand Up For The Saracens!
The main reason for this is that, obviously, a lot of other people are wanting to do it as well so there are massive crowds to deal with, often lots of excitable children running around, generally public transport to deal with and fairly often nowadays a big publicity/marketing machine blasting out adverts and music at high volumes.
All of this leads to a massive drain on energy levels just to keep that 'public face' mask on - the one that looks happy and calm and isn't showing the intense pain that's being experienced at the time. I understand the need for big venues (particularly sports venues) to create and stimulate 'atmosphere' but I would like some acknowledgement of the cost of this on people like me.
Today's Saracens vs Quins game at Wembley was wonderful but there were moments when I could have done without the random blasting of pop music and the overly excitable commentator. Overall though Wembley/Saracens did pretty well at hosting an enjoyable but relatively autism friendly event.
By far and away the worst event I have been to in my life however was back in November when I went to the O2 arena to see the Tennis ATP finals (Murray vs Nadal). What I endured there actually drove me to tears and ended up forcing me to leave early as I simply could not bear to remain in that environment any longer. The whole venue was blue coloured (as it was sponsored by Barclays Bank who are blue themed) which meant that wherever there was lighting it was the blue shade that makes me automatically think of emergency services sirens which leads to low-level but consistent anxiety. Most of the problems I had with the venue (very airless and 'close') could have been overcome but for the damn graphics the event insisted on using every time there was a challenged decision - a pulse beat on the screen and at full volume echoing across the court. Now, maybe its just me but I hear a beat that sounds similar to a heartbeat and my heart subconsciously tries to mimic it, leading to an increased highly-anxious heartrate and my breathing starting to go into hyperventilation. All of this led to me needing quite a bit 'down-time' to recover enough to drive my brother and me home that evening, a recovery that was set-back by the fact that I had to deal with getting the tube from the arena back to where my car was parked in Westfield!
The issue of 'what happens afterwards' came to the forefront today as well, while the getting to Wembley wasn't too bad and dealing with crowds going in was surprisingly calm the exit, naturally, wasn't. Even though I stayed to watch the Sarries boys do their lap of the pitch and then wasted another 15 minutes or so faffing around finding where my friend had left his bike, still the crowds for the tube were horrible to deal with. I wish that there could have been shuttle buses specifically running people to the nearby major train terminals (Kings Cross, Euston, Paddington etc) to allow for those of us going there to avoid the tube, leaving it just for those who were connecting to other parts of the City.
I made it home in one piece mostly - a major headache and quite a considerable need for quiet, but in a lot better shape than from other times I've been into London. Despite how good today has been though I know I've still got recovery ahead of me, tomorrow will probably come with a strong desire for sleep and quiet processing time along with other side effects such as affected appetite, clumsiness and probably achey joints.
It was worth it though - Stand Up For The Saracens!
Sunday, 10 April 2016
Autism Training and Presentations
Having been sorting through my laptop and trying to organising my filing a bit better I thought it might be a good time to record the various topics I have spoken about in the past, along with the ones I have things prepared for, just in case anyone would like to learn more!
* "Education: Learning to Cope"
* "Autism in Pink - Personal Health domain"
* "Autism Training for Schools - sensory focus"
* "Females and the Autistic Spectrum"
* "Finding the balance between Reasonable Adjustment and Professional Development"
* "Pressure and Perfectionism - Coping with Society's Expectations"
* "Sensory Sensitivities"
* "What the Future can hold"
* "Autism and Sport - why doing something is important"
* "Social Interactions - how to start them and how to survive them"
* "Overload, Meltdown, Shutdown - what to do when things go wrong"
Most of these are aimed at people who want to learn more about Autism or who want guidance for how to improve things for Autistic people, please do get in touch if you want anymore information about anything above or want me to come talk about something different, I'm willing to talk about pretty much anything I have experience in!
* "Education: Learning to Cope"
* "Autism in Pink - Personal Health domain"
* "Autism Training for Schools - sensory focus"
* "Females and the Autistic Spectrum"
* "Finding the balance between Reasonable Adjustment and Professional Development"
* "Pressure and Perfectionism - Coping with Society's Expectations"
* "Sensory Sensitivities"
* "What the Future can hold"
* "Autism and Sport - why doing something is important"
* "Social Interactions - how to start them and how to survive them"
* "Overload, Meltdown, Shutdown - what to do when things go wrong"
Most of these are aimed at people who want to learn more about Autism or who want guidance for how to improve things for Autistic people, please do get in touch if you want anymore information about anything above or want me to come talk about something different, I'm willing to talk about pretty much anything I have experience in!
Sport and Autism
Now, people may call me biased on this one but I genuinely believe that sport can be one of the most important things in the world. To the autistic mind sport can represent many things; an ordered routine, a stress management technique, a pleasurable experience and even an understandable route to socialisation.
The last one is something I hugely advocate; using sport as a way to interact with other people can be a real godsend to someone who struggles with social interactions and knowing how to approach others. Autistic people are often told we 'go on too much' about our special interests or inappropriately want to talk about an exam we've just done or a meal we've just had. But with sport its not exactly unheard of for people to talk at length about a game or match they've just watched, breaking down ever play, every ref decision, every strategic gamble. Its also less frowned upon to know lots of stats and information about the people/clubs/places involved in sport, its seen to be the mark of a 'true fan' to know lots about a clubs history.
I remember times in the past when I very deliberately used this technique to ease my way into a social interaction - a couple of hours the night before dedicated to watching a football match followed by some quality Wikipedia research and suddenly the next day I could join in with the lunch break conversation about Liverpool's chances on the away leg. The beauty of the concept was that I could choose when to employ this, even at times shying away from talking about a game I had actually watched because I wasn't comfortable with socialising on that particular day - to my colleagues the small lie that I had 'missed it as I was tired' didn't just give me the excuse for not joining in but also allowed them to see the exhaustion written all over my face and slightly adjust their behaviour around me for that day, giving me more space.
Some people find it funny when I talk about sport, I'm not exactly what you would imagine a sports enthusiast to look like, but its the world I was brought up in. My parents ran an amateur cycling team in the 80s/90s and to me normal life was spending hours at the local track, weekends out following the road races, visitors regularly popping round for leg massages or team talks. I often talk in presentations/training sessions about 'safe memories' that can be used to help bring someone round from meltdown. My main and most powerful 'safe memory' is being in a village hall surrounded by guys that have just finished a road race, knowing that everyone in that room knows me and I am completely safe. To this day the smell of strong tea, oil/grease, sweat and muscle rub will mentally take me back there - the smell of Deep Heat is known to most people I encounter to be a sensory trigger for calmness and safety.
I think there's a lot that's wrong with sport at the moment, and I'm not talking here about doping allegations and ridiculous salaries, but about the way people (particularly autistic people) struggle to access sport. I want so much at the moment to get back into regularly supporting a sports team but find the pressure to be undeniable, if you try to say you are a fan of a team people expect a certain level of commitment, you can't seem to just say 'I support Saracens' without people saying 'well, when did you last go see them play?' 'are you a season ticket holder' 'do you got to any away matches' 'are you going to the European matches' 'are you getting tickets to the final' etc etc etc.
The sad thing I would love to be able to say yes to those sorts of questions, I want to commit fully to being an active supporter of a team because I think the clubs and the players deserve that, but I know I would struggle to maintain that level of support, I'd be fine whilst things were going well (both personally and for the team) but things get a lot harder when life becomes more complicated. A bad week at work coupled with an away game that results in a loss would send me into a tailspin, the sheer amount of energy I would have to expend on coping with the loss and then the subsequent lengthy journey home would leave me running on empty and with little time to recovery enough to cope with work on the Monday (especially if its a Sunday game). And this worries me, I don't want to be seen as a glory hunter supporter, only going when things are going well for my team (for the record I was introduced to Saracens as a team when I was 12, early impressions last and I often find the team I gravitate to in any sport is the first one I encountered!)
I'm heading to Wembley next week to watch Saracens vs Harlequins, I picked this game to go to because I'm familiar with Wembley and I know that there will be a different expectation of the crowd at this sort of game to one at Allianz Park. I hope the day is good, when I went to this match 4 years ago I did struggle at various points because of little things that could have easily been avoided. I'm hoping at some point to get to a Saracens home match just to see if I can manage it, time will tell on that one!
I hope there is a way forward for sport to engage more with the autistic community and listen to what we have to say, there are so many small adjustments that could be made to make our participation in sport better and more likely to be repeated. I've actually started to write a training session relating to autism and sport talking about those adjustments and why I think its so important. I just hope one day I can use it.
The last one is something I hugely advocate; using sport as a way to interact with other people can be a real godsend to someone who struggles with social interactions and knowing how to approach others. Autistic people are often told we 'go on too much' about our special interests or inappropriately want to talk about an exam we've just done or a meal we've just had. But with sport its not exactly unheard of for people to talk at length about a game or match they've just watched, breaking down ever play, every ref decision, every strategic gamble. Its also less frowned upon to know lots of stats and information about the people/clubs/places involved in sport, its seen to be the mark of a 'true fan' to know lots about a clubs history.
I remember times in the past when I very deliberately used this technique to ease my way into a social interaction - a couple of hours the night before dedicated to watching a football match followed by some quality Wikipedia research and suddenly the next day I could join in with the lunch break conversation about Liverpool's chances on the away leg. The beauty of the concept was that I could choose when to employ this, even at times shying away from talking about a game I had actually watched because I wasn't comfortable with socialising on that particular day - to my colleagues the small lie that I had 'missed it as I was tired' didn't just give me the excuse for not joining in but also allowed them to see the exhaustion written all over my face and slightly adjust their behaviour around me for that day, giving me more space.
Some people find it funny when I talk about sport, I'm not exactly what you would imagine a sports enthusiast to look like, but its the world I was brought up in. My parents ran an amateur cycling team in the 80s/90s and to me normal life was spending hours at the local track, weekends out following the road races, visitors regularly popping round for leg massages or team talks. I often talk in presentations/training sessions about 'safe memories' that can be used to help bring someone round from meltdown. My main and most powerful 'safe memory' is being in a village hall surrounded by guys that have just finished a road race, knowing that everyone in that room knows me and I am completely safe. To this day the smell of strong tea, oil/grease, sweat and muscle rub will mentally take me back there - the smell of Deep Heat is known to most people I encounter to be a sensory trigger for calmness and safety.
I think there's a lot that's wrong with sport at the moment, and I'm not talking here about doping allegations and ridiculous salaries, but about the way people (particularly autistic people) struggle to access sport. I want so much at the moment to get back into regularly supporting a sports team but find the pressure to be undeniable, if you try to say you are a fan of a team people expect a certain level of commitment, you can't seem to just say 'I support Saracens' without people saying 'well, when did you last go see them play?' 'are you a season ticket holder' 'do you got to any away matches' 'are you going to the European matches' 'are you getting tickets to the final' etc etc etc.
The sad thing I would love to be able to say yes to those sorts of questions, I want to commit fully to being an active supporter of a team because I think the clubs and the players deserve that, but I know I would struggle to maintain that level of support, I'd be fine whilst things were going well (both personally and for the team) but things get a lot harder when life becomes more complicated. A bad week at work coupled with an away game that results in a loss would send me into a tailspin, the sheer amount of energy I would have to expend on coping with the loss and then the subsequent lengthy journey home would leave me running on empty and with little time to recovery enough to cope with work on the Monday (especially if its a Sunday game). And this worries me, I don't want to be seen as a glory hunter supporter, only going when things are going well for my team (for the record I was introduced to Saracens as a team when I was 12, early impressions last and I often find the team I gravitate to in any sport is the first one I encountered!)
I'm heading to Wembley next week to watch Saracens vs Harlequins, I picked this game to go to because I'm familiar with Wembley and I know that there will be a different expectation of the crowd at this sort of game to one at Allianz Park. I hope the day is good, when I went to this match 4 years ago I did struggle at various points because of little things that could have easily been avoided. I'm hoping at some point to get to a Saracens home match just to see if I can manage it, time will tell on that one!
I hope there is a way forward for sport to engage more with the autistic community and listen to what we have to say, there are so many small adjustments that could be made to make our participation in sport better and more likely to be repeated. I've actually started to write a training session relating to autism and sport talking about those adjustments and why I think its so important. I just hope one day I can use it.
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